The Adventure & my Fears

I want my life to be an adventure. THAT is why I'm losing weight.

I came to that realization yesterday when I was running in a circle. I realized I hated it because it was mundane and boring, and not an adventure.

You know how people tell you why they want to lose weight? What their motivation is...well, I never really knew for sure. For some people it is their kids, well nothing against you guys, but I don't want kids ever, so that doesn't fit the bill. Yes I want to live a long life, but that has never been a pressing enough issue for me to really get up and go...at least, it isn't a pressing issue yet. About the closest thing that I've ever been able to pin point down as my real motivation is the desire to be hot. Yeh, I know it is pretty vain, but whatever.

But really, none of these 'motivators' ever made it stick.

But running in that circle yesterday, I started thinking about why I hated running in a circle. I hate it because it is not an adventure. I want to explore! And try new things! That is why this picture make me want to run...


You see that bend, at the end of the path. I want to see what is around that bend. To be cheesy and quote Disney:

What I love most about rivers is:
You can't step in the same river twice
The water's always changing, always flowing
But people, I guess, can't live like that
We all must pay a price
To be safe, we lose our chance of ever knowing
What's around the riverbend
Waiting just around the riverbend

I look once more
Just around the riverbend
Beyond the shore
Where the gulls fly free
Don't know what for
What I dream the day might send
Jut around the riverbend
For me
Coming for me

Yes, that is why I want to lose weight and be healthy...because I've never met a fat person that had a really adventurous life. The only fat people I have met, including myself, sit around all day dreaming for a beautiful life. Most of them never go out and get it. And that is exactly what I'm going to do, I am going to go out and get that adventure!

...Just to name a few...

Am I afraid of heights? Yes
Am I afraid I could possibly die doing several of these things? Yes
Am I afraid I'm going to look stupid doing or training for them? Yes
Am I afraid I will fail? Yes
Am I afraid I will not get to do them all? Yes
Am I afraid? Yes

You know, Project 365 wrote about fear today. (Stop by her blog if you haven't, this girl has got it together! I can't wait to see her continued results.) I'm going to steal a quote she had on her blog today, because it really hit the spot.

"It takes courage to push yourself to places that you have never been before...to test your limits...to break through barriers. And the day came when the risk it took to remain tight inside the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom." -Anais Nin

I am more afraid to never try than I have ever been of not succeeding.



I guess I should blog a little bit about how my days going, lol. It is going good :)
I'm fasting today. My husband brought me a chocolate covered oreo (omg) but I'm saving it for tomorrow morning. It is going to taste so good! Went for a walk with Candice, and I hope I get to go for another one this afternoon. Gonna watch the Biggest Loser tonight! Woot! (Stuipd me thought it started yesterday, so that was a let down). I can't wait to run tomorrow. I'm going to try a park that I have kayaked at before. It will be an adventure! :)

PS - It is so freaking cold here in Houston, Texas. It is literally freezing outside! But, I'm not gonna let it be an excuse!! Instead I just bought some long underwear, lol.

Have a great day all!