This last week I lost 7 pounds. YAY! Awesome right? Well, not so much. Don't get me wrong. It is great and I am very happy and excited. I am doing so well consistantly working out and consistantly eating within my calorie range. I also didn't want to lose 7 pounds. I just want to lose something. If it would have been 2 pounds, I can honestly say I'd be happy. And who knows. Maybe next week it will only be 1 pound or no pounds.
But the thing is, I've been here before. I've seen this weight, and I've seen a lower weight too. So I have these mixed emotions. I'm happy about the loss and my success in being healthy, but I don't want to brag or to make this big deal out of it.
And why is that? Could it be that I still have this urge to define myself only by that number on the scale. I could be smaller, it could be lower. And that is ALWAYS going to be a possibility. I can't define myself by these numbers. When I'm 150 pound am I going to be saying, "Oh man, I could weigh 140 pounds." That will be REALLY annoying. This journey is a forever one, and I don't want to define myself by the scale forever. So I'm stopping.
Sure, I've seen this weight before. But I'm not celebrating the weight. I'm celebrating a week of great consistency that equaled results, no matter what the result may be.
My point is that at some point we have to realize that focusing and defining ourselves by the number on the scale is not going to make us happy. And what is this all for if not to make ourselves happy? So while you are going to all this effort of changing your habits to exercise and eating healthy...you need to start changing your mind set too.
With that in mind...Yay for me! :)
Im proud of you Olivia!! Did you audition for Cabaret? I see it in italics, but im not sure if thats the stuff youve done or have yet to do!
ReplyDeleteI can completely relate with you on this, but here's how you HAVE to look at it: Ok, you may not be at your goal, but you are taking a step TOWARD getting there. You have to celebrate the "smaller" victories otherwise you will beat yourself up to not even moving foward. You are making steps forward, not backward and that is a great thing!
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